So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Vodka?
Forever.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
Randomize