so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
Randomize
