Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
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