Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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