so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Still dying that you shit outside
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
