Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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