I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
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