im drinking this country out of the recession.
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
How does one acquire holy water?
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
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