The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
