i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
Randomize
