I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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