It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Randomize
