While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
The feeling are messing with the penis
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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