just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Randomize
