if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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