i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
