was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
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