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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
