My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
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