so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Randomize
