i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Randomize
