windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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