you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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