Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
