I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
Randomize