are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
