the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Randomize
