I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
You smell like a Billy Joel song
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
You just projectile vomited on my dad across the table at waffle house.
Do you think he can smell the vodka?
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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