You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
You're earring is so big in my mouth
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
I took your shirt off for you after you threw up on yourself, read you the ugly duckling, and then tucked you in. you better fucking love me, jackass.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
