similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
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