Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
