i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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