she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Randomize
