the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Randomize
