it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
Randomize
