so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
only if we run a train.
done.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize