i think my tv is drunk
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
My vagina just clenched in fear
Randomize
