Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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