At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Randomize