I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Randomize
