the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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