yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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