listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
It's hard for me to sext him when the picture i see on my phone when he texts me is his facebook default of him and his girlfriend.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
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