Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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