He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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