I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
We smell like vodka and hangover
Randomize
