call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize