My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Yeah, I probably need some combination of electric shock, massive quantities of LSD, and enough couch time time to make Woody Allen say "Enough".
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Randomize
