We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
i just ate an entire onion plain. all alone. i have never felt more single in my life
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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