the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
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