it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize
